This year, Patterson students have been writing original narratives, poems, and personal essays in both our Creative Writing Club and our Creative Writing Class. Their hard work is being collected and shared both on our online literary magazine (FathomLitMag.com) and, now, here in the Patterson Press. If you would like to know more about how to participate in either the class or the club, see Mr. Ritter in room 352. Enjoy reading and keep an eye out for the first print edition of Fathom, our school’s literary magazine, by the end of 2023.
“When I’m 18, I’m Gone” by Fanie Tenezaca-Montesdeoca
“When I’m 18, I’m gone”. I remember getting my brother mentally ready for me to leave when I turned 18, telling him what he would have to do if my dad had one of his anger issue attacks and put a hand on him, how to manipulate him in order to survive living in hell, how to put up with all the bull**** in order to not give up. I would show him my ways and share my experiences to make it easier on him because I’ve been through hell and back.
Growing up with divorced parents was hard. Picking what holiday I would spend with my dad and which ones with my mom, or even which parent I would take if there was a parent conference or graduation. Not only that, having to raise my brother was harder. It’s nothing I regret but while I saw little girls playing outside with their dolls and enjoying their time, I was inside making milk bottles for my brother. I always wanted to be that girl who looked so happy, looked like she was loved and was just enjoying her childhood. There was a time where I created a hate toward my parents because of everything they couldn’t give me and for taking my childhood away from me.
My dad was the selfish one. Yes, he brought food to the table but he never took the time to sit down and talk to me. He never told me how proud he was of me. He would always criticize, looking for every chance to tell me that I wasn’t good enough, that I would never make it. My mom is a very loving person but a very insecure person. She was so insecure that she also always pointed out my flaws. My mother created my insecurities: my nose, my stomach, my weight. I wasn’t good enough for her either. My mom was the cook which meant she would give the other kids good meals but I was on a strict diet that she created. Sometimes I didn’t’ even eat. I would spend hours looking at myself in the mirror, crying because I felt like I wasn’t enough, asking myself if I looked differently would my mother love me and not compare me to my cousins. She wanted me to be a perfect young woman that knew how to cook and clean. She was preparing me to be a good wife for a man and be ready for marriage. She always said that my husband should never touch anything in the kitchen because that was our job as women.
I thought a parent was supposed to support you, have your back, motivate you. Well mine did the opposite. They unmotivated me and created a thought in my head that I wasn’t good enough to go to college. The biggest dream I had of going to college was crushed for a time because of them. I always dreamed of going to college. It was something that I knew I wanted to do and it would be my biggest accomplishment. It would prove that even if I went through hell I could become something without anyone’s help. My mindset has changed through the years and struggles. I’ve become better and know my worth. I know what I want and I know that I can accomplish it. My mentality has grown a lot and slowly the thought of, “When I’m 18, I’m gone” has also changed. I realize that I have overcome so many negative lessons and that every lesson made me a Strong Independent Woman. I know I am enough. I know that I will accomplish all my dreams.
“?” by Anonymous
My being is not worthy of love
It is a vessel of melancholic music
Feelings that are unexplained
And no light in its darkness
There is no one to explain to
No one to understand
It is just I
Sitting in the depths
Of my own mind
Watching through my eyes
As I think of the things
But my mouth utters differently
But there’s no reason to hear my truth
So I keep living this life
As a passenger.
Untitled by Anonymous
You already know, you are my best friend.
The morning will come again, No darkness and no season is eternal.
Maybe it’s the cherry blossoms and this winter will end.
I miss you.
I miss you.
Wait a bit, just a couple more nights.
I’ll be there with you
I’ll come for you.
Through the edge of cold winter until the days of spring come,
until the days come when the flowers bloom.
Please stay, please stay here a little longer.
“Jenni’s Cry” by Anonymous
Jenni shakes her dignity, sobs until tears run down her cheeks, and
The breaking of waves in the distance and the waking of birds are the only other sounds.
She has beautiful kids, A beautiful house, and deep dignity, but she must keep her word, and she won’t sleep until then.
She was lying in bed, weeping how her husband took her confidence and her dignity.
She got up from her dreadful bed, her mind was full of sad thoughts, and she worshiped death.
Prepare for the new day with endless anxiety and the thought of her husband coming home.
“Untitled” by Mula
In the depths of the ocean blue, where light is scarce and darkness true
Lies a world both eerie & grand
Mysterious, untouched by man’s hand
Down below where creatures roam
In fathoms deep, far from home
Whispers echo through the waves
As mermaids sing & sea monsters play
The pressure builds, the current swirls
As schools of fish in unison twirl
And coral reefs like castles stand
Guarding secrets of this underwater land
A world of wonder yet so unknown
Where the mighty whales make their throne
And ancient creatures lurk below
In the fathoms deep, where few dare go
So if you ever find yourself at sea
And hear a call from the deep blue sea
Remember there’s a world down there
In the fathomless depths, beyond compare.